I remember on the weekend visits with my dad, he would say he was still trying to figure out what he wanted to be when he grew up. To my young adult brain, he seemed already grown up. In fact, if he wasn’t grown up, who is?
Back in school, I wanted to grow up to be a vet. That is, until I learned how many years of college it took and that they had to put animals down at times. Never mind! I was told in school that I could be anything I wanted to be. The sky’s the limit. Dream. Then go after them.
I did. It didn’t work…as I planned it would, so I stopped. “What do you dream about,” whispered the Lord one day while I was on a walk. I didn’t want to go there again. Obviously my dreams weren’t His and I was OK with that now. There He goes again rocking the boat. Since we’ve been home from Kenya and we have our answer that we belong here, I’ve asked the Lord, “What now?”
Yes, my dreams of being a famous writer are still there. I’d love to host women’s retreats with my mom and take my kids back to Kenya again. But underneath it all I want to matter. I want to answer the question, “Do I matter to someone?” with YES! And I know I do. Sometimes, I may feel small, but I know I matter. Sometimes this desire to do big things for God can just overwhelm me! For I am powerless to do that without Him.
To be perfectly honest, I desire all these words He gives me to heal, soothe, connect and give meaning to you, my reader. I also want to tell missionaries “Good job! Keep going!” I want to provide a place of refuge for people who have poured out all they have and can’t go on another day.
I want to bring you a tray full of refreshments – ice cold lemonade and homemade cookies while you watch a movie with your feet propped up. I want to be real. Because I serve a REAL God. He’s not made of plastic. He’s not just for the good, nice people with clean floors and shiny cars. He’s the God of the broken, the beat down, the weary, the divorced, the hurt, the confused…the sinner. He’s a God that meets us in our most desperate hour. He hears our prayer. He holds our tears. He’s not afraid of our questions or even our doubt.
He is real. He is Truth. He is Healing. I want to serve Him to you through my Words. But you have to take this glass of lemonade and drink it. It won’t quench your thirst sitting on this tray.
So what’s my dream now? That we would realize we don’t have to go to Africa to follow Jesus. Oh, I do hope you travel there sometime (may I recommend Lighthouse for Christ?) for it’s an experience of a lifetime. But that’s not the only way to follow Jesus. My dream is that we would see ourselves as missionaries right where we are. That we would pray for those people around us. That we would serve them, love them, share truth with them, care for them, be real with them, not because of something we might gain, but because they’re a person – created in the image of God.
So that’s my dream. And guess what…You’re a part of it!
Because you’re a part of it, I want your input. Tell me your story. How have you been Transformed by Truth? Maybe it’s your salvation story. Maybe it’s a realization of a small truth, but has set your free. Little, big, or inbetween, I want to hear it. With your permission, I’d like to share it here on this blog. Don’t worry if you’re not a “writer”. You still have a story. I want to hear it, and so do others. We all need encouragement on this journey of life. We realize we’re not alone when we read other’s stories of struggle and victory. So email it to me. juliecsteck@gmail.com Go! Do it today, before you put it off. And just for doing it, I’ll send you my new E-book, In Our Own Words for free.
Thanks flickr for the photo