My body and mind scream to quit.
“I can’t do this” spills out of my mouth all too frequently.
I pray for something to give.
And yet, I keep walking.
I’ve descended down the mountain into the valley. It’s dark, damp and clammy.
Yet, I am thankful for my husband. He keeps this family grounded. He keeps me grounded. I’ve been ready to fight or flight for weeks. Packed. Ready.
Somehow Adam, in his gentle way doesn’t clip my wings. Partly because he knows if he did, I’d find a way to fly anyway.
Instead, he grounds me, and not from TV. He calmly sits me down and shows me what’s going on behind the scenes. He unveils the core issue(s). Then, smoothly he states what is best and somehow makes it my idea. Brilliant!
The core issue now: We’re in the middle of change and it’s not the time to make additional life altering decisions!
Adam knows me. He knows I don’t do well backed into a corner. So after surveying the situation, he concluded what was pinning me there.
Space – lack of adequate amounts physically, emotionally and spiritually
Community – again, the lack of it.
Our remodel has us living on top of each other. Nothing’s organized. Nothing’s clean.
If you know me, you know I’m not famous for “everything in its place and a place for everything.”
But it might help a little here!
This continual state of disarray has me depressed. It’s caused me not to invite guests over for dinner or friends over in the afternoon.
Which contributes to deficiency #2 – Community.
I miss people being here. That’s the reason we’re adding-on in the first place – to hold more great folks! To hear more laughter, bake more cakes, share more stories.
I also miss the fellowship of our Lifegroup. In June our home-church group went our separate ways. It was best. It ended well. But still, that since of bi-weekly community is gone. I miss it.
All the more confirmation that my husband’s right. Not a time to make further major changes.
So what do you do when you face difficulties? Do you share your struggles with your husband? Do you allow him the opportunity to lead your family? Husbands, do you treat your wife like a wine glass? Do you handle her with grace and care, while you pray for wisdom to lead her? I hope so, because we need you to!
Are you single? Who do you go to in times like this? I pray God will give you a friend to lean on.
I also pray that others of us are willing to lend a shoulder, a hand, a hankie to a friend in need. That we will listen with love and compassion.
Listen, life is tough! Homeschool takes a community. Raising kids takes a community. Staying married takes a community. We weren’t made to do this stuff alone. Yes, Jesus fills our gaps, and often He does that through another person.
Yet I find, in these difficult seasons, I can be most difficult to love and commune around. I’m not exciting. My make-up isn’t done. I’m not going to exactly lift your spirits. But I need you. Please don’t leave me now!
Check out what faced Jesus when he descended from the mount of transfiguration. There’s so many parallels you won’t want to miss for your own faith journey! (Matthew 17:1-21)
I’m so glad you traveled with me today. I hope you’ll join me again tomorrow.