Sunrises

How would you describe the color of the sky during a morning sunrise? Is it boring brown, black, gray or white? No! How about flaming torches of orange, red, yellow, even purple on occasion?

This morning on my jog I saw the most beautiful cloud splashed with a purple not found in a crayon box. I thought it interesting that usually clouds are cotton ball white or stormy gray, but this morning the colors of the dawn reflected on the cloud and not just the sky. When I started out though, before the sun rise, blackness clothed the sky. As I ran, I witnessed the sky go from black, to purple, to shining white and clear. Remind you of anything else? I wish it could have reminded me of a beautiful, fragrant flower, rich in color. But no, it reminded me of a bruise. Bruises usually start out black, then after a few days turn purple, blue, sometimes even green. Then after awhile, they return to normal skin color and the evidence of the mishap is gone. I thought the purple cloud was beautifully breathtaking this morning, and I must say, I’ve never thought that about a bruise.

Have you ever been bruised by God? You may be appalled by the question. Have you ever been bruised because He didn’t answer something you specifically asked for with all the faith in the world? Bruised because He answered differently than you expected or took something/someone away from you? Bruised because what you thought were right choices have left hard consequences? Or bruised because of His silence? I have, with all of the above, and it hurts. I felt His presence with me as I thought about this, and laid out, with tears, again the areas that were still a bit tender. Then I looked back up at that magnificent cloud. It was displaying the Lord’s splendor right in front of me, for what other God could bring up the sun every day in such a fashion? I think in the same way, our “bruises” are opportunities to display the glory of the Lord, if we will surrender to His sunrise schedule. A few minutes later and a different cloud would have been on rotation and been put on display, but God chose THAT cloud for this morning. And by the time my miles had ended, the once “bruised” cloud was a glorious shining white with not a trace left of purple. Now that reminded me how Jesus has purified us whiter than snow and left no trace of our old self.
One of my favorite songs on the radio right now has a line that says “Make me broken so I can be whole”. Sometimes, that’s what God has to do with us. Break us, to then make us whole. How glorious it is that in a painful process we can be shining examples of His glory to others, and maybe even encourage others as they might be picked as that cloud tomorrow.

HEAT

I was a runner in High School. But that was 1.5 decades ago, 3 births, 36 months of nursing, 15 birthdays, 5,475 days of marriage, countless meals, sleepless nights and lullabies ago, so it doesn’t really matter! About a month ago, the Lord nudged me, challenged me rather, to roll out of bed before the rooster crows and meet Him on the road. Finally, I had ignored Him and slept in long enough, so I set the alarm and committed to obey this voice in my head. Either I was completely crazy and one run would be enough or the Lord really was speaking to me and I would grow in this process. First morning I couldn’t sleep, for thinking of how early that alarm would go off and how terrible I would feel if I didn’t get to sleep! Let’s just say I saw 2 am and the alarm was set for 5:30. That’s not much sleep for this must-have-8-hours-of-sleep connoisseur.

After jogging regularly for a month now, I feel my body getting stronger, but more importantly, my prayer has been for the Lord to train me to be Godly. “Teach me to listen to your voice”, I have prayed. Physical conditioning is important to health and vitality of my days, but spiritual conditioning will endure beyond this earthly body. So, no headphones, no agenda, just me and the birds, listening to my Savior.

At first, just the task of running overwhelmed me. I set my goal and measured my course for 2 miles, but even prayed that if the Lord had a plan for me to go a different route or a different amount of miles I would listen and obey that. Of course my first thought was to the worst – that He’d want me to go 5 miles tomorrow and I just wouldn’t be able to do that. But then, on the other hand maybe He would say 1 mile and I’d have an easy day. It was 2 miles throughout the entire 1st week and that was hard physically for me, especially on 5 hours or less of sleep. I wanted to stop MANY times, but prayed for the Lord to strengthen me, and He kept my feet moving one in front of the other. I was amazed, though at how I was still able to function, even with joy, in my day. He completely multiplied my strength as I obeyed.

The object I noticed first, UNDENIABLY was the sun. It would just be peaking over the horizon line as I crested over the hill and set out with fields stretched out on both sides. Instantly, when that sun breaks through you feel it’s heat. Everything does, nothing is exempt.

I thought about the “heat” I’ve felt in my own life. Pressure and trouble in relationships, decisions, haunting thoughts of “what-ifs”, responsibilities….the list could go on. I felt an impression on my heart that said, “I am the heat you’ve been feeling”. No, God doesn’t BRING us hardship, as in the context of being MEAN. Rather, He ALLOWS them, as fiery furnace for gold or a crucible for silver, to bring out the impurities within, and with the goal of making of making us holy. I should rejoice in that heat, for He is there! My life cannot be hidden from His heat if I am His child! I should be worried if I DIDN’T feel His heat, for those whom the Lord loves, He disciplines!

Thank you Lord for your heat. The pressures in our life that MAKE us turn to you, completely rely on you. Increase our trust in you in these intense heated times of our life, that those impurities may be cleansed away and not hold us back in our walk anymore. I pray for those who are hurting and struggling today, that you would give them joy instead of ashes, a garment of praise instead of a spirit of despair and you would make all of us oaks of righteousness, a planting of yours for the display of your splendor! Amen

Jude 24 “To Him who is able to keep you from falling and to present you before His glorious presence without fault and with great joy…”

Thief or Conquorer? Both!

“Momma, why do people steal?” asks my 8 year old cowgirl.

“Well,” I respond with heaviness in my heart and a prayer of wisdom on my lips, “have you ever wanted something someone else had?”

A resounding “YES!” comes from all 3 kids in the backseat of the van.

“Well then someone who steals chose to simply take what wasn’t theirs instead of working to earn the money to buy what they wanted or the lacked character to ask for it.”

At that moment I realized there’s a little bit of the thief in me. In me resides the inclination to steal, kill and destroy. It’s a force to be reckoned with, not deny. The desire to have something that’s not mine left unchecked by the Spirit could lead to robbery. Paul said it best in Romans 7 (paraphrasing), I don’t do what I want to do and I do the thing I don’t want to do! There’s a battle going on inside my soul everyday! Will I choose to walk in my flesh and gratify my human nature – which FEELS really good and satisfies for the moment, yet leaves me out to dry once the moment’s over? Or will I walk in the Spirit – putting aside my SCREAMING demands and obey the still small voice?

Have you ever had a screaming child in the car? You’re driving home and about 10 minutes away your infant wakes up, STARVING! What can you do besides speed up a few notches and maybe rock the car from side to side? Driving while nursing is definitely NOT recommended! You know the child will survive 10 more minutes, even though he/she does not.

It’s the same way with our walk. My flesh can scream out at me to give in and satisfy my emotion – which is no different than stealing a candy bar from the gas station. That’s why Jesus went to the cross. To embody all the sin of the thief, the murderer, the adulterer, the liar. It all died with Him! Then He walked out of the grave and offers us His hand to join Him. We ‘walk in the Spirit” when we realize the depth of our sinful nature, (our speck) stop pointing out our brothers saying we could never do that, and choose to say “It’s only by YOUR powers Jesus I’m not the thief right now! Lead me, Help me to follow you…because without YOU I am NOTHING!

And it gets better…God says to me His grace is sufficient for me and His power is made perfect in my weakness. He says I am more than a conqueror through Jesus. He says He will lead me in triumphal procession in Christ and spread everywhere the fragrance of the knowledge of Him. He says He will keep me in perfect peace when my mind is steadfast on Him. God tells me the moment I look to Him, I am saved. I have the mind of Christ, the spirit of sonship and can call the LORD of all, Daddy. I am His daughter. He says nothing can separate me from His love. Not my fears, not my thoughts, not the fear of my thoughts…nothing….nothing….nothing. I am His and He is mine.

Yes, I am capable of the worst of sins – I could do it all in a heartbeat. I may feel guilty in the morning, but don’t we all? Paul shares a similar story in Romans 7:14-24 and ends with these words, “What a wretched man I am! Who will rescue me from this body of death? Thanks be to God through Jesus Christ our LORD!

John 15:5 “I am the vine; you are the branches. Whoever abides in me and I in him, he it is that bears much fruit, for apart from me you can do nothing.”

Life Stitches

Why do I love to sew you ask? Ahhh, let me count the ways… #1 It connects me with my mom and grandmother. #2 Sewing allows me to use my creativity on something other than my kids and husband. #3 It sucks me into a time warp where suddenly I don’t feel hungry, tired or worried about life. All I can think about is the next stitch and how excited I am to see the finished product!! Sewing is not something I take lightly, actually, I don’t take anything lightly, and so sewing obviously is no different! I also race to finish things, so I’m terrible at a seeing fabric draped over the machine waiting patiently for me to have time for it. I just part the waters of life, sit down and SEW. All of that to say it was one of those “sewing weeks” as we call it in my house, and this was one of the last pieces to make. It was a sleep shirt. Simple… Easy… Right? Sort – of. I’d done this pattern before but always messed up on the neckline. I thought I had figured it out and was excited to get to the dreaded part, confident I knew what to do now. This wouldn’t take long! Did I mention it was about 9pm…kids in bed…long day…husband feeling a little lonely due to “sewing week”?? Well, that’s just a minor detail anyway. So here we are…the neck seam and I had it figured out. I pinned. I checked. I double checked. Finally I begin to sew, carefully and slowly because I’m working with a knit fabric and a knit stitch that is almost impossible to rip out if it’s not right. Excitedly I do the final backstitch, cut the strings and examine my work. My heart says, thump, thump, thump… “NOOOOOOO” My idea was not correct, I had stitched the whole thing wrong again! So instead of snuggling next to my husband clothed in a homemade shirt, I, through clenched teeth and watering eyes undid tiny stitches until my eyes couldn’t see anymore and my stomach was in knot. Not the rewarding feeling I was looking for.
 
The next morning I woke up and after breakfast picked up right where I left off. That’s when it hit me…
 
As the “creator” of this sleep shirt, there’s really no mess up, no stitch that I can’t take out. Even if I messed up the whole thing or cut it in two, I could always buy more fabric and do it again, because I have the PATTERN.
 
Then I related it to MY life. There’s no stitch, no marks, no cuts that God can’t fix. He has the pattern. He is my CREATOR, therefore, I cannot mess up His masterpiece. Because actually, in my mess up, He becomes MORE. You see that zig zag stitch there? That’s where I started to veer off the right, chasing after the wind and God had to do some extra stitches there. You see that my right sleeve is a different shade then the left? That’s because I sewed it on backward. God decided to leave it as a reminder that He comes first and when I’m abiding with him, I’m going to look different than those around me. You see that neckline? All the holes because the stitches were taken out so many times it put holes in the fabric? There wasn’t a way to pull out the stitches (things in my life not honoring Him) without pulling out what was around it and leaving a hole. Yes, I’m a mess. But I’m God’s mess, and He’s not finished with me yet!!!


How can you relate that to your life? What stitches have needed to be ripped out? Or maybe left in to remember He is perfect, we are not. I pray you will let God be your Creator. I pray you dance in the freedom of His arms. I feared messing up for so long it stunted by ability to dance with Him. He loves us with an everlasting love. If you are in Christ, He loves you just as you are today. We can embrace that truth and let Him create us as He will. 

Roses, Shakespheare and Names

“What’s in a name? That which we call a rose by any other name would smell as sweet…” questions Juliet to Romeo in Shakespeare’s famous play. Juliet pours out her love in hopes that they can defy the fate their names will inevitably bring. Would a rose smell as sweet if it weren’t called a rose? That may have to be a discussion for a different blogger, but it does pose the question…what power is there in a Name? What about in a Word?

Although Romeo and Juliet only lived on the stages of Shakespeare’s plays, that line came to mind as I read about the power of God’s Name and His Word.

My youngest child, Zach, had a bad dream the other night. When that happens, he doesn’t join his brother on the top bunk or slide in with his sister across the hall. No, without hesitation he sets out on the trek through the living room and past the office, in the dark, to Mom and Dad’s room. There, finally safe, he can squeeze almost invisibly under the covers next to mom and it will be several moments until she realizes his presence and several more before she’s coherent enough to respond in any way! But Mom and Dad’s room holds some kind of power for him. Either bad dreams aren’t possible there or because he’s with us, or, when the bad dreams come, he won’t be scared.

God’s Name holds the same power for us. When life spins us in a bad, real-life dream, do we long to be in the Presence of the Almighty who will either command it to go away or walk with us through the dark, giving us Supernatural armor and might to defend the invading army?

My children have been memorizing the armor of God passage in Ephesians 6 this year. There’s some hidden secrets way back in the book of Exodus 28 that add depth to our breastplate of righteousness. And, yes, it also has to do with names…

Exodus 28:35 begins, “Fashion a breast piece for making decisions – the work of a skilled craftsman.” It goes on in detail of the gold, twisted linen and specific dimensions of this piece. Then, there was to be four rows of precious stones, each “engraved like a seal with the names of one of the 12 tribes.” Attaching to the breast piece by rings and blue cord was the ephod, which also held engraven names. This connected the two pieces so that the breast piece would stay in place and not move around. Here’s the neat part – verse 29 says, “Whenever Aaron enters the Holy Place, he will bear the names of the sons of Israel over his heart.” Since Old Testament times our hearts have needed to be covered. Now, not only do Aaron and the priests have the names of the 12 tribes covering them (a foreshadowing of Jesus Christ’s perfect covering to come) but they also have something holy stuck to them as they make decisions. Those names should spur them to make decisions based on whose they belong to (the Great I AM) and to glorify Him.

Compare this account with Ephesians 6:14 which says, “Stand firm then, with the belt of truth buckled around your waist, with the breastplate of righteousness in place.” Why is it righteous? Because it has Jesus’ name inscribed on the front and it’s in place! That breast piece enables me to stand before the God of the Universe as blameless! Also, as I make decisions I have the reminder that I carry that name with me and the power it possesses.

The names of those who have trust Jesus Christ as their Lord and Savior are written in the Lamb’s Book of Life (Revelation 3:5 & 20:15) One day our name will be called and looked up in that book. At that time, no matter what credibility or disqualifications you feel your earthly name bears, we must be associated with the NAME and the WORD. Will your name be found? Hear Jesus calling you in the words of Revelation 3:20, ” Here I am! I stand at the door and knock. If anyone hears my voice and opens the door, I will come in and eat with him, and he with me.” His words are not a catchy phrase from a famous playwright, they are the WORDS of LIFE.

More than new curtains

I resist change. Even good change. It shakes my being like an earthquake. My wants and desires fall from the shelves and break like china against the invisible force. I’m more of a variety girl – keep the structure steady and unchanging and allow me the freedom to paint the walls, sew new curtains or re-arrange the furniture as I’d like. Unfortunately, if I call myself a disciple of Jesus Christ, that requires CHANGE. Here’s what I mean…

In Philippians 3:13b-14, Paul exhorts us to FORGET what lies behind and STRAIN toward what is ahead as we press on toward the goal. In the previous verses, Paul states that he considers ALL his earthly riches a LOSS compared to the surpassing greatness of knowing Christ as LORD. He considers them “rubbish, that I may gain Christ and be found in Him, not having a righteousness of my own….but one through faith.” (Phil 3:8,9)

Do you hear the change that MUST take place? Consider another passage:

Matthew 9:16-17 Jesus says, “No one sews a patch of un-shrunk cloth on an old garment, for the patch will pull away from the garment, making the tear worse. Neither do men pour new wine into old wineskins. If they do, the skins will burst, the wine will run out and the wineskins will be ruined. No, they pour new wine into new wineskins, and both are preserved.”

And one more…

Matthew 18:3 “I tell you the truth, unless you change and become like little children, you will never enter the kingdom of Heaven.”

Before new wine can be useful and preserved, the old skin must be thrown away. Before we can STRAIN toward what is ahead, we must FORGET and THROW OUT what lay behind. Before we can KNOW the surpassing greatness of Christ, we mush consider all things a LOSS. Before we can ask Christ to be our LORD and Master, we must first CONFESS and REPENT. We get to trade in our old way of life for Jesus’ new beginning. Variety won’t cut it here. Moving around the same old habits and patterns while keeping the same framework isn’t change. That’s a mask. Masks must be ripped off. This is CHANGE.

Here the internal struggle begins. It’s called Spirit-filled vs Flesh. Our flesh wants nothing more than to hold on tightly to our old ways, old thinking patterns, old stand-bys. It won’t RELEASE without a FIGHT. With reminders of past sights, smells, tastes and feelings, our flesh grasps to keep the flame of the old self alive. It’s in that moment we must die to ourself, turn around (aka change), and accept the good news Jesus offers. Do you know what that good news is? The power of sin and our flesh is BROKEN by the POWER of the CROSS for all who believe.

Change may rock us to the core and leave us bare-shelved and broken. Thankfully, the CHOICE to change comes from us, but the POWER of transformation belongs to CHRIST alone. Will you join me in this journey of change? The price is high…in fact it may cost everything! But the end result is so much better than new curtains or re-arranged furniture.

Philippians 3:20-21 “But our citizenship is in Heaven. And we eagerly await a Savior from there, the LORD Jesus Christ, who by the power that enables him to bring everything under  his control, will transform our lowly bodies so that they will be like his glorious body.”

The Long Cut to Paradise

Have you ever taken a short cut only to find yourself….lost? That 5 minutes you were saving has long expired and been replaced with 30 minutes extra! Sometimes I wonder when I’ll realize that taking the familiar road isn’t so long after all.

There’s a similar story in the book of Exodus where God took His people, the Israelites, the long way around. However, His plans are always perfect and hidden in this “long-cut” lay a lesson about Himself….

Exodus 13:17-18 says, “When Pharaoh let the people go, God did not lead them on the road through the Philistine country, though that was shorter. For God said, ‘If they face war, they might change their minds and return to Egypt.’ So God led the people around by the desert road toward the Red Sea.”

Did you notice how God didn’t lead the Israelites the short way? He intentionally took them by the long road, lest they see difficulties and turn back. But do you remember what BIG THING lay on this “long road”? Yes, the Red Sea. God knew full good and well it was approaching. He didn’t panic when Moses reached the edge of land and the people were wailing, “Was it because there were no graves in Egypt that you brought us to the desert to die?”. God didn’t look to Jesus and say, “Shoot! I forgot about the Red Sea! Holy Spirit, pull up the GPS map and see where they need to go from here!!” No, God had a plan.

So if God’s in control and He’s intentionally, on purpose, divinely guided his people to the edge of disaster, what are they supposed to do? What is He doing and WHY? These are the kind of questions I ask when faced with my version of the Red Sea. Verse 15 of Chapter 14 answers it best. “The Lord said to Moses, “Why are you crying out to me? Tell the Israelites to move on. Raise your staff and stretch out your hand over the sea to divide the water so that the Israelites can go through the sea on dry ground.” Then in verse 18, God explains part of the why…. “The Egyptians will know that I am the LORD when I gain glory through Pharaoh, his chariots and his horseman.”

If you haven’t noticed, to just keep walking when the road ends takes faith. Abundant faith.
God’s ways are higher than our ways, so we can’t always know WHY, but we can rest in the fact that He knows. Maybe He has us here to refine us, or meet the needs of someone around us, like the Egyptians in the example above. It could be just to bring Him glory. It’s not because God needs an ego boost, but because the sooner we focus our eyes on Him and take the spotlight off ourselves, the more satisfied and abundant people we will be. That’s just how He created us, how He knit us. We have an insatiable NEED for God. Only when we come to that realization and yield to it can we walk through the water that threatens to flood our path. Circumstance don’t catch God off guard. He’s not reeling and searching GOOGLE to find the answer to my problem. He’s in control of it. He’s at the helm. He’s the CREATOR.

“Do not be afraid. Stand firm and you will see the deliverance the LORD will bring you today. The Egyptians you see today you will never see again. The Lord will fight for you; you need only to be still.” (Ex 13:14) Will our hearts obey Him when we hear Him saying that to US?

Faith Floaties

Do we need proof of God’s Word being alive and sharper than a double-edged sword? How about reading a familiar bible story in a fresh, new light and it producing in you a realization that you never saw before? That’s what happened to me with Matthew 14:13-33. This is my rendition of that moment…

The feeding of the 5 thousand happened right after Jesus heard about John the Baptist’s beheading. He withdrew by boat to be alone. What He was feeling, we aren’t told. But, interrupting that quiet, alone time, was the crowds that began gathering around him. Filled with compassion, He began teaching them and healing the sick. As evening came, the disciples remind Jesus everyone will be getting hungry soon and they sure don’t have enough food to feed such a crowd. The familiar story then unfolds when food multiplies from Heaven and Jesus produces enough to feed them all. After the baskets were returned, the leftovers bagged up, Jesus sent His disciples on up ahead of Him while He dismissed the crowds. Jesus, however, decided to resume his “quiet time” and retreated again to a mountainside to pray A-L-O-N-E. Meanwhile, His disciples have now drifted a considerable distance away from the shore because it’s almost morning. Jesus approaches them, walking on the water. The disciples’ mouths gape open in fear, but Jesus says,”It is I. Do not be afraid.” Peter speaks up and says, “Lord, tell me to come to you.” “Come on,” Jesus says. Peter inches out, then realizes what he’s doing and a million doubts fill his head. Instantly his feet begin to fail and he’s sinking. “Help, Lord!” he yells. As Jesus swoops in to gently lift him up, Jesus asks, “O you of little faith, why did you doubt?” I imagine Peter saying, “But Lord, the waves…I …..can’t….” Jesus rests him on the boat and the wind stills. The LORD has walked into the boat and all creation must obey Him. 

Jesus didn’t still the waves to boost Peter’s self-confidence. He let him sink, carried him to the boat, then stilled the waves so that the disciples would worship HIM. I agree with the disciples, “Truly you are the Son of God”!

Natural Reflections

My son once told me, “Cars are like shoes and trucks are like boots.” I’ve reveled Caleb’s natural, sixth sense of categories since he was 9 months old. I remember reading one of his picture books together and he pointed eagerly to a bar of soap and washcloth on the page. He immediately closed the book, grabbed my hand and insisted we walk down the hall to his bathroom where there was also a bar of soap and washcloth draped over the tub. Words weren’t even necessary for me to know he’d connected the dots!

So now it’s my turn to make a connection. His statement remind me of Solomon’s words in Ecclesiastes 3, which has brought me great comfort this past week with the passing of my grandmother. Here’s what it says in verses 1-8 : “There is a time for everything, and a season for every activity under heaven:
a time to be born and a time to die,
a time to plant and a time to uproot,
a time to kill and a time to heal,
a time to tear down and a time to build,
a time to weep and a time to laugh,
a time to mourn and a time to dance,
a time to scatter stones and a time to gather them,
a time to embrace and a time to refrain,
a time to search and a time to give up,
a time to keep and a time to throw away,
a time to tear and a time to mend,
a time to be silent and a time to speak,
a time to love and a time to hate,
a time for war and a time for peace.”
I’m so comforted to know that God understands the stages of life – and proves Himself all sufficient through them all. God, who’s original plan was not that we should die, for that is what sin brought into this world. Yet He never turns His back on us and is there to heal every hurt this fallen world inflicts. I praise Him for that!
Throughout this past week of witnessing the last days of my grandmother, I see so many parallels to the beginning of life and the end. And Ecclesiastes confirms there’s a time for both. God has appointed for us all a time to live the life He’s given us and a time when He calls us home. There was a time my grandmother would’ve healed from a shoulder injury, but this time she didn’t. (vs. 3) There’s a time to search out the answers to life’s questions and a time to just let it be.
A sweet friend told my tearful, apologetic Grandfather, “It’s OK to cry. It’s a time to cry.” (vs 4) And it is! I’m so thankful God is with me – us, in our time of mourning. We won’t mourn forever, because it says in Psalm 30:11 “You turned my wailing into dancing; you removed my sackcloth and clothed me with joy.” I can rejoice in so many things, – memories, friends, but most of all because God is good. His goodness endures forever. Caleb’s cars, trucks, boots and shoes will soon be in the “time to throw away” category, but those who trust in the Lord may fall asleep in this world, but awake to an eternal home that never spoils, fades or perishes!! Amen!